Sorry, But You Need To Stop Apologizing For Your Marketing

Sorry! But You Need To Stop Apologizing For Your Marketing

Are you one of those people who starts sentences with the word “sorry?” As in, “Sorry, but I just think coffee is better than tea.” I’ve been noticing that more and more lately. Not just in every day colloquial conversation, but in the way that businesses of various sizes manage their marketing.

A few days ago I was reading an article written by a marketing professional about using space and furniture to create a more productive work environment which was based on the principles of GTD (Getting Things Done). The article was really good. I found her insights really provocative. However, the first paragraph of the article was an apology because apparently the author had not written an article in a while.

Did this article need to start with an apology? Did it need to have one at all?

No.

This was the first time that I had ever read anything from this author. My first experience was a mix of appreciating the value of what was written combined with caution because the author was telling me up front about a perceived failure. What does that do to my trust? What does that do to the authority I perceive?

I’ll tell you what; it diminishes it.

The apology was altogether unnecessary.

If you listen to our podcast, you’ll know that we have a running joke where we say, “Don’t apologize.” The joke got started before our podcast even premiered. Our good friend Mike Brooks once had an episode of his Nuclear Chowder Podcast where he told his audience that he was going to structure his show so that his main segment would not exceed 30 minutes. Then he went on to produce amazing content for 45 minutes. What followed was legendary in the halls of Casa De Web.Search.Social. Mike went on for 5 minutes apologizing to his audience for talking for 45 minutes instead of 30. But here’s the thing; the content that he created required 45 minutes and there was no way he was going to know that before hand.

Mike and the author above both fell into the trap of setting artificial constraints that didn’t matter because their content appealed to their audiences. What value does limiting a 45 minute conversation to 30 provide? What value does telling me that the article I’m reading had a lag time between it and the preceding article?

None whatsoever.

I want you, Dear Reader to create content that matters to your audience and leave everything else out. The extra stuff is just fluff. It doesn’t matter. Even worse, it may cultivate a negative feeling.

Imagine for a moment that the author above convinced me that allowing so much lag time between her articles was a bad thing. I would have left and not bothered to return. After all, she’s the one setting the precedent that she’s possibly unreliable. Practically, if someone got to her article, they got there to read that content, not for exposition on why the article took so long to produce. No one cares about that.

On Mike’s end, I’m willing to bet that no one noticed that his promised 30 minute talk turned into 45 minutes. I bet they were engrossed in the value the talk delivered. I was. But imagine if someone decided that they could sit through 30 minutes, but 45… Well, that’s just too much. And they decided to stop listening. After all, Mike was prepared to deliver his 30 minutes, but then apologized for 45. That means 45 is bad, right?

Wrong. And fortunately Mike knows it. He has rarely if ever repeated the same mistake. Which is a shame because our listeners know that we love to make fun of him.

So here’s the challenge for you:

When you are creating content, don’t worry about lengths or word counts. Don’t worry about how much time elapsed between your current piece and the last.

Just focus on your audience and what they need. That’s it. And while we’re here, I want to tell you something that may be a bit jarring for you to hear: When you go 45 minutes instead of 30 or you write 10 paragraphs instead of 5 or you apologize for having a cold…guess what? No one cares. Well, not that they don’t care about you, but they don’t care what happened behind the scenes to get them to this content. They just want the content. Don’t project your guilt onto the audience. It only serves to diminish the relationship.

As for me, I lied to you. I said “sorry” in the title of this article, but I’m not sorry. I’m here to tell you once and for all…

Stop apologizing for your marketing.

Ralph M. Rivera
Hi, I'm Ralph! I'm a web developer at Rahvalor Interactive, a creative marketing services company that I founded in 1999 with my wife and business partner Carol Lynn. In January 2012 we created Web.Search.Social as a branded service offering that brings enterprise-level services to small businesses in an affordable way. I'm also founder and CTO of Podcaster's Toolbox, a SaaS platform designed to help podcasters plan, produce and promote their shows. I teach web development at Manhattan College in New York City. Carol Lynn and I are home based near the Jersey shore but we're currently location independent and traveling the country for a year, working and podcasting. I'm also trying to build a flux capacitor, but that's not going as well as the other stuff I do.
Ralph M. Rivera
Ralph M. Rivera
  • “The Altogether Unnecessary Sorry”

    Sorry my post is longer than promised
    Sorry my podcast went overtime, too
    I’m sorry I must seem quite unreliable
    Sorry I am always apologizing to you

    Starting with “Sorry” is totally sorrowful
    Relationships will diminish and crumble
    Habitually apologizing for your marketing
    Is a miss, a mistake, and a sorry fumble

    Sorry my poetic take is so short today, Fred. Oops. I mean, isn’t it cool how I summed this one up in just eight lines?! πŸ˜‰

    • Krithika Rangarajan

      WOWZA – you need to partner with Carol and Ralph to create a coffee-table book of poems that summarizes all their posts? πŸ˜‰ #HUGS

      • Yes! I’d read that! πŸ™‚

        • Well now that we’ve got your vote of confidence, Alisa — it’s a done deal! πŸ˜‰

          Carol Lynn and I have talked about doing some brainstorming so we’ll keep you posted. For the time being, I’m having a blast paving the way for podcast poetry. Who knows? It might catch on. πŸ™‚

          • I hope someday I get a Melanie Kissell poem! πŸ˜€

          • What a sweet thing to say, Alisa. I’ll make a note of your request. Now you’ll just have to wait till March 4th to see if you get one. πŸ˜‰

            May I put your name on the waiting list for the coffee table edition? (Publication date TBA)

          • Krithika Rangarajan

            Please send me a signed copy πŸ˜› πŸ˜‰

          • Why, certainly, Krithika! I’ll place you on the waiting list. πŸ™‚

      • That’s a fantastic idea, Krithika! Something to adorn every SuperFred’s coffee table. πŸ™‚

    • I just love how everything has a title now!

      • That’s because I know you’re going to ask me to write one so why delay? LOL!

  • Krithika Rangarajan

    Very interesting,

    Since childhood, most of us have been taught to apologize profusely and frequently, especially if you are aware of your mistakes! I never considered the negative impacts of saying ‘Sorry’! But that’s kinda why I subscribe to your blog – you always expand my thought processes! Thank you! #HUGS

    I start almost all my offline sentences with: “Sorry, but can I?”; “Is it okay if?” πŸ˜‰ EESH – this is the WRONG kind of ‘permission marketing’, eh? πŸ˜›

    My advice to that writer who apologized for the ‘delay’ in her posts would be: let your audience know in advance that you might be taking some time off. This way, you wouldn’t have to apologize when you get back – you can just start your post with a cheery, “Hey! I am back! Aren’t you glad to see me?” πŸ˜‰ (or something to that effect). If she cannot predict her hiatus, it might be more prudent – based on your post – to let people know what was going on in her life: “It’s been a crazy two months…” lol

    Just rambling, as always

    Thanks again, Ralph #HUGS

    Kit Rodgers πŸ˜‰

    • Really good points, Krithika. I was taught to apologize profusely and frequently, too. Yes – thank goodness for this podcast and all the cool topics of discussion. Web.Search.Social never steers you wrong. πŸ™‚

  • kyleyoder

    Only Americans have to apologize to satisfy the communist masters.